A few weeks ago, I offered my 16 best tips for being a fabulous bridesmaid! Here are my 16 tips for groomsmen you will want to share.
- Again, I’ll start with the obvious. The bridesmaids are not your dating pool for the night (or leading up to the wedding night). Be a respectful gentleman. Don’t be that stereotypical frat boy trying to “hook up.”
- Don’t make any sarcastic remarks about getting or being married. Keep all the jokes, puns and one-liners to yourself.
- Chances are, the groom isn’t going to be real clear with instructions or expectations. It’s a guy thing. Early on, establish a clear line of communication with the bride or the maid of honor. Rather than all five (or 12) of the groomsmen trying to communicate, it should be the best man receiving all the instructions and passing them on to the rest of the groomsmen.
- If you’re a groomsman and reading this, you’re probably wondering what on Earth is there to communicate about. Well, there will be all sorts of details along the way that you will need to know about. In addition to the bachelor party, you will need to know about wedding showers, tux fitting appointments, and the rehearsal dinner. You may be expected to prepare a toast or learn a special dance.
- Do offer your help to the bride and groom. Be willing to say yes when asked for help.
- If you don’t already know the bride-to-be, spend some time getting to know her before the wedding day. Plan a fun group outing. It will make the wedding day run smoother and a lot more fun if everyone is familiar with one another.
- If at any point, you are not clear on what the
groombride expects of you… ask. It’s better to clear the air with straightforward instructions than to create awkward moments because of a reluctance to step forward. Actually, there should be lots of conversations early on about what each groomsman is expected to do.
- If you happen to be the best man, chances are you will have many more responsibilities. Accept them with honor. And, don’t lose the ring!!
- Attend as many of the wedding showers as you can—all of them is ideal.
- And yes, even though you are in the wedding party, you are still expected to buy a wedding gift.
- Look your best! Make sure you have a fresh cut and clean shave on the big day. Your hands and nails should be groomed well. Shoes should be shiny, clothes should be pressed and shirts should be tucked in. If part of your attire is a bow tie or pocket square (or both), make sure you know how to properly wear these things before the big day. YouTube® has tons of tutorial videos.
- Want to really up your game? Learn to pin on that boutonniere. There are never enough ladies available to do this when the time comes.
- Keep a secret—a secret plan that is! Plan something epic, yet tasteful, for the bride and groom. This can be a song parody, a secret song dedication, a skit, or a slideshow. If you really want to make it memorable, include the bridesmaids!
- Have fun at the reception, but remember to drink responsibly. Don’t hit on the bride’s mom or barf on any of the bridesmaid’s dresses.
- Although I’ve never personally experienced this, I have read many horror stories. Don’t be a sexual-harassing jerk to the female photographer. It’s not cool AND you could cause them to walk out on the bride and groom. Many photographers have clauses in their written agreements that stipulate if this happens (by any wedding guest), they are instantly released from their contractual obligations. This means, they walk out whether in the middle of the ceremony or the cake cutting.
- Usually, at the end of the reception, a lot of things need to be packed up and hauled away. Make yourself useful. Take off your jacket, roll up your sleeves and put yourself to good use.
Tips for Groomsmen
A bride and groom have every right to expect their groomsmen to behave well at their wedding. As a member of the wedding party, almost just as many eyes are on you as are on the bride and groom. You are, in a sense, representing the lucky couple and they have handpicked you to play this part. Don’t let them down. Represent them well and with pride.
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